Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

Killing your friend as a joke.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming and it seemed like a safe time to cross

What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

balls

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

Casey Anthony kills a baby

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

Cancer.

A lawyer met with his client and said.. well, there is some good news and some bad news The bad news is that you're going to prison for life.

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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