Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

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Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

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Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Bible Fact0idz: "Something Drink my blood and consume my flesh and live forever something" Jesus- dead age 30something alcoholism liver problems and diabeetus at time of death, crucified and not been seen since, return pending? Classified Alcoholic. Moral: "YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

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you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

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A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back in middle school, they were both friends. They hung out every day and always had the best fun. It wasn't until their baseball team made it to the junior championship. That was when seven started doping for better strength and endurance for the game. Sevens family and friends (Especially six,) Had started to notice a change in sevens behavior and he seemed more distant from any social relationships with others. Seven began to become angry and self centered and only seemed to be focused on the game. Seven found out that Six knew that he was doping and fought him and brutally injured Six. Seven was then found out by the coaches and was kicked off the team. Seven, knowing that he had ruined his whole life, Shot himself with his dads .38 Revolver.

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a little violence in a relationship doesn't hurt anybody

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what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

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Waffles ate my grandma

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Why do vampires suck blood? Because they re crazy.

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Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

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Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

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Whats funnier then a dead baby? A lot of things.

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if a joke has not punch line, how does that strike you?

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hey! did u just fall??? ..no..gravity wanted a hug.!

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the drunk man puke? Because he was drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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