I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Poetry is hard And so is wood

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Why didn't the man get to see his family on Christmas? He was blind.

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What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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How do you confuse a blonde? take the albuterol

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being unaware of his surroundings, the chicken was startled by an oncoming motor vehicle. Due to the animals vapid logic an reasoning, based on impulse it quickly ran to the other side of the street to avoid its imminent death by the speeding automobile. Unknowingly, the chicken had reached the other side of the road,

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

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That day where Captain America becomes too weak and frail to hold his own shield.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

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THE GAME.

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Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

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Ebola

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what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

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what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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Why did my pussy get wet? Because I splashed him with water. LOL SO FUNNY OMFG DA BEST JOKE EVA!!

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops