What does a dinosaur and TImmy's mom have in common? They're both dead

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Why wasn't the man wearing a life vest? Because he was sleeping.

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The joke below was so funny I forgot to laugh.

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What does a Barbie Doll and Britney Spears have in common? They're both 100 percent plastic.

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What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

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so how about that irline food

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

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And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Your mom's so ugly that after being ridiculed for for year she became very self conscience and killed herself. Her family was very sad for many years.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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Q: What did one Christmas ornament say to the other? A: I didn't know they could talk! Get me that ornament so I can chat with him!

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knock knock... ...no answer

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Ryan Holden is a faggot.

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What's black and hangs from trees? Tire swings

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Whats green, and says i'm a frog? A talking frog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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