Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

Will nearis is here! Get it

mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

Q:How meny jews can u fit in a mini? A:5 in the seats and 1 million in the ashtray.

life is like a box of chocolates........no it's not

Q-whats green and has eyes. A-A frog are you stupid

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

why did it take the black man 1.5 hours to get out of a movie theater? he wanted to patiently wait for the movie to end.

bish bash bosh giz a nosh

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

Q: A blonde walks into a bar. What does she get? A: An icepack.

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

Only steers and queers come from Texas and i dont see any horns on you so what does that mean? It means I am not a Minotaur.

If I was a backstabber, you would have been dead already, without me having anything to do with it in the first place, listen, we cannot change the world, those that control the media, control the world. And our role was the opposite, we wanted people to find their individual selves and put their talents for use for themselves and us, today the media tells people who they are, what they like, and what to eat and wear. None of us can do this, point zero is gone, its simply a matter of time, but if you want to try, I can do what I can, in hopes of delaying the inevitable.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad that this joke took your mind off your terminal cancer?

Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

koj yog ib tug tsoob qaib eater, uas nyiam mus rau Peer li qub poj niam qhov chaw mos raws li ib tug nyiam ua! (Google Translate may help)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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