Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

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Whats funny about a kid with down syndrome q: a lot of things, like his face

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What would Micheal Jackson do if he were alive today? THRILLER! THRILLER! THRILLERS NIGHT!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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Well, there's one way...

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What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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What do you call a sheep with big teeth? Mitch

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What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

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What did the 14 year old girl get on her birthday? A cake that read, "You're adopted"!

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Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

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Poop!!

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What do you get when you cross Jesus with James Woods? Crucifixion

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder from your house and kindly help him down.

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How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

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9/11

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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What do shoes and boxes have in common Both will get squashed if a washing machine lands on one of them

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This statement is false.

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Roses are grey, Violets are black, I have Alzheimer's, Barthtub.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops