Q.whats the difference between a women's argument and a knife A. a knife has a point

billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

did u here bout the guy who found 500 dollars on the ground? yup he is 500 dollars richer

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

This is no joke. Well, I did warn you.

What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

Two men walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O!" The second man says "I'll have some H2O too!" Both men get water, because the bartender knows better than to give someone dihydrogen dioxide.

Why did the man wear his jacket because he was cold

How do you start a fire in the woods? Call Cole Ryder!

Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

Why was little Jimmy sad? Multiple complications including broken bones, a fractured skull, liver disease, and the fact that all his family had been gassed by the Nazis.

Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

Two Jews walk into a concentration camp. One goes to work and the other one gets gassed.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...