Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff, Whats not pink and fluffy? Sexual assault.

never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

seven guys rob a bank, they share it in this ratio 2:2:2:4:2:5:2 who got the most money? you don't know

one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

Q. what is the most amazing animal in the world? A. MULLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

What is worse than going to school? Nothing.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

What do you call a black man and a black woman having sex? A husband and wife who love each other very much and are trying to have a baby.

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...