What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

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A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

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whats funnier than 24? 25

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Two octopuses are swimming in the ocean. Suddenly a scuba diver spots one of the octopus. The octopus looks at the human and swims away.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

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mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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If you were a cactus, why?

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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What did Hitler say to Obama Nothing because Hitler is dead.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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A seal walks into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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