Why is Jordan Abu Arabian ? Because his mom is!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: What did Nala say to Simba during the stampede? A: Nothing. She was nowhere to be found during that scene.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

*knock, knock* "Who's there?" *knock, knock* "Who's there?" This went on for hours, as man 1 was deaf, and man 2 was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's red,little and its in the corner??? --- Strawberry in the corner

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: A squirrel a chipmunk and a spider monkey are fighting over these nuts. Who gets them? A: Your Mom ;p

thumb_up thumb_down -11

i'm filthy rich literally because money is dirty

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's the difference between a paper towel and a crab cake? Ones a paper towel and ones a crab cake

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I peek in your window, Yes, I'm watching you

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Yes, it's actually very nice.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what did the black guy say to the white guy im black

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the Teacher cry? Because he was sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? The baby is not a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -11

-knock knock -i'm not at home, go away!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a man who's eating thirty big macs ? Hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What does the ice cream man say to the kids? Hey kids want some ice cream?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Depends how you look at it, I like some girl, she and that girl gets along, I get along with the two girls, and yeah, I make them fight to the death as I consume the weakest one and make the new one my wife of darkness! Well, actually, threesomes, but NEVAH, NEVAR!! *shakes fist towards the skies* with another man! Now if my waifu wants to have some fun with a girl, I say why not (and then she asks if I want to join always so far), its genetics, you know, each caveman had like 600 wivus and he did not have time to bang them all, now let those genes go trough MAN for a couple of millenia, and he becomes the KING OF DEMONS... ME! Those other scumbags are a whole other story. Oh, and the 600 wivus did either go without sexytime, or you know... I mean you do KNOW that women are like comfortable naked together and yeah...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is Soulja Boy's favorite letter? I don't know. You go ask him.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops