How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

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Q.How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A.You don't. You kill her.

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I live in a very rural area, so it's not easy to just go to the store and pick something up. I try to find out how to do things with the stuff I have on hand, so I Googled spot remover, but there are only pictures of stain cleaners. Please help. Spot has rabies.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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Why did Sally cross the street? Because someone was gonna rape her if she didn't.

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What is old and fancy and comes in two pieces? Marie Antoinette.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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What is a 6.9? A period getting in the way of a good time!

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Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

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Knock knock whos there? Jake jake who? jake from state farm, and i'd like to tell you about our insurance company

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a banana? Banana's don't hijack planes.

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your mama so jewish ( fat ) she had to take up two seats on the plane to fly here in the end there was no chocolate left she was taking up the whole plane space.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

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What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

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What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

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why did the black guy say he was ridin' dirty? because its been weeks since he last took it to the coin op, he's busy working as an I.T Specialist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops