My momma's so ugly she had to get plastic surgery. Now I need it.

What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

What is white and square? A ping pong block

Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

why couldnt the black man fly, becuse his master said he coudnt.

What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

My uncle Magnus and my Aunty Agnus had a baby and named it.............Death.

Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

your mammas so big that she needs paint rollers to put on lipstick

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

What do you do if you are surrounded by 2000 Hungry cannibals? You talk to them in a calm yet determined diplomatic voice, then you become a part of them. Moral: A part of them... Forever.

yo mama's so fat, she wears a big belt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...