A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

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What do Mitt Romney and Barak Obama have in common? Nothing that is why they are running against each other for US President.

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Why did the girl fall off her bike? I threw a ball at her.

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

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What did the psychopath say to the firefighter? Can you lend me a few bucks? My clothes are dirty and I need to go to the launromat.

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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So there was a jewish guy, a black guy, and a white guy all sky diving. They all had an amazing time and they all went to a bar later to talk about what they just had experienced.

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Just found out that it doesn't work.

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Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Why did the whale rape a guy? He wanted to see what would happen.

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Whats black and is on sale in shops? Blackberries.

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A black guy walks into a bar. He drinks some wine and exits the bar. -Lets Go Mets, not Yankees

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what do they do to dead Mexicans? skin them and make them in to wet suites.

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:)Knock, Knock :(Who's there? :)Barbie :(Barbie who? :)Barbieq

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why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

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I baked tonight. What did you bake? Brownies. What kind of brownies? Chocolate.

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A dyslexic man gets asked what 1+1 is, he replies with a wopping 11. Grats <3

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Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 had a gun.

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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