What has an orange t shirt A dick I lied about the shirt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did david give back? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

thumb_up thumb_down -17

LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

You are pretty bad emulations, first of all you should all swear and cuss a lot, that way you never get green thumbs and you all get minimal attention (negative attention) from people whose messages do not concern. I mean come on, if you are all different, you gotta admit that you are all good at typing like the very same person, its just that, none of them are good at sounding as the guy they are trying to emulate.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the gorilla fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Scrub that muck off at once Hubert Cumberdale!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

knock knock no no you go now i clean

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red violets are blue I want to F%$# you with a rake

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops