What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A vast quantity of things.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

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Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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Penis. (Note: if you get this you have a dirty ass)

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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What do you call an Asian man in a car? A motorist.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

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I'd like to make this joke funnier but I can't. It's stupid. I don't even like it.

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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"Really, how is your wife?" "You know she's dead right?" "Cool mine too!" They high five in mid air and lived happily ever after

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? AIDS

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This statement is false.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

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Q: Whats black and white and red all over? A: I am unsure for I am color blind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops