In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

how do you get a girl of a swing? puch her off! how do you get her friend of a swing? throw a refridgerator at her!

Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

how do women get from the kitchen to the bedroom? they walk there.

there is 500 dicks on the wall how many will choke on? None?? so ur a professional!!!! lol

What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

Why could'nt the Jew drink milk? He was laptose intolerant.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *goes crazy and shoots himself*

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

But one McDonalds Happy Meal for the price of two, and receive another McDonalds Happy meal absolutley free!

Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

an dislexik nam rwote hits

How can you tell a baby lost it's voice? It doesn't scream when you staple it to a ceiling fan and turn it on.

What is white and long? A New York winter

Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

Q: Why did the bear fall out of the tree? A: Because humans tranquilized him, brought him to an animal shelter 100 miles away from his home. Then after he got out he got hit by a car and died. PETA is watching.....always

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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