A black man confronts a small white man on the sidewalk and asks for money. The white man responded "no".

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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That is so fetch

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

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So two guys walk into a bar and the third one ducks

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? George Bush

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs falling skydiving? Jon, because that's his name.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

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What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

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4/20 is a holiday just like Christmas.. I lied you just get baked

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Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

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Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

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a man walks out of a gas station and sees an indian with his ear to the road. He walks up to him and the indian says "truck... ford truck... large man in front with flannel shirt and trucker cap... german sheperd in passenger seat... licence plate 4563u6." Amazed the other man says " wow, you can tell all of that just by listening to the road?" The indian says "no thats a the truck that ran over me five minuites ago"

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Three penguins are at the top of snowy hill. The first penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" The second penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" Finally, the third penguin slides down and hill and yells "RADIO!"

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Q. Pete and Repeat were sitting on a wall. Repeat fell off. Which one was left? A. Pete. Yep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops