What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a black man and a black woman having sex? A husband and wife who love each other very much and are trying to have a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter, he won't come.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

roses are red, violets are blue, im not going out with someone that belongs in a zoo.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A blonde goes in an electronic store. She buys a TV and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Terry was always struggling with mathematics. On his last report card he received a D- in math. His parents were naturally very upset with him because they knew their son could do much better and so did Terry. Terry wanted to make his parents proud so he buckled down and started studying on a regular basis. Terry realized his had work had payed off when his 3rd grade teacher handed him his report card. Terry had revived an A in math! On his walk home from school all he could think about was how proud his mom and dad were going to be. On that walk home Terry was savagely torn apart by an escaped lion from the local zoo. His head was never found.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, vilotes are blue Erics a dick and Chase is too.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q.What did the homeless kid get from santa? A. Play Doe. Because he was a good boy. Q.what did the Rich Kid get form santa? A Coal. Because he was a bod boy. The rich kid then got mad and threw the coal at the homeless kid hitting him on the head which killed him of enturnaly bleeding.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops