- Anti Joke

What's funnier then the holocaust? A second one.

Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail.

What do you call a black man riding a plane? A black man riding a plane.

Question: how many times a power rangers episode show a power rangets face ANSWER: dont ask me im not that big of a power rangers!

hahah there are so funny that they are so funny that they are so litteral that i make my self make other people laugh so that they poop

One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

Q: What has the exact same colors as the gay flag but are sometimes hilarious? A: Clowns.

Doctor everybody that I stare at seems to die moments later! Uh, why are you looking at me so intensely... >:)

Why didn't the black guy get paid for doing work hard at labor? it was the year of 1860!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

Kris- "Hey! Ask me if I'm a tree! Kait&Alyssa- ".....Are you a tree?...." Kris- "No.(:"

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What did the agnostic say when he turned blue? He said "wow why am I blue?"

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Hearing this joke again.

Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

Why did the fall off the building? ... because I pushed her

A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.

I grunt when I poop.

yo mama so stupid, she went to the super bowl an bought a spoon

What do you call a creepy person trying to break into your house? A robber

The WNBA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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