Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

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What starts with D and ends with ICK? Drumstick.

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What's frozen and eaten off a stick? Your dead uncle Norman

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We are not familiar with the specific circumstances, therefore its difficult to determine exactly why.

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What sound does a snail make? Meow....... Think hard and you'll get it

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what did the fart say to the butt........bye

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally!

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Math mean: mental, abuse, to, human

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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asdf

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Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

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Whats brown and sticky A stick!!!!

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Womans baksetball...

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Why did the priest take a little boy into the back room? To talk about the boy's future.

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A black man, a white man, and a group of Jews were all walking down the street. They got hit by a bus.

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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My Butthole.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops