A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

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A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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How do you put on a condom Very Carefully

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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