Yo mamma's so fat, that she weighs alot.

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because the party was a rave and some mushrooms are know to make the consumer of them hallucinate wildly.

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What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

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Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Why did the old man die? He died because he saw the light wich happened to be a street light in the distance.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream for shit

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why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

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Did you hear about the guy with no legs? He had them blown off by a tank shell in Afganistan.

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What has 4 legs and cant walk? A paralyzed dog

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Why did the Chicken Cross the road? Because it did...

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Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

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there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

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Knock Knock Whos There Policeman Policeman who Please open then door your fathers been in a terrible car accident

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why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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what did johnny's mom do for his 50th birthday? she died

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

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Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

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I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops