What is it called when you kill a gay man? Homocide

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A woman is on an escalator, which stops, then she cries. Why? The escalator is in a hospital and stops because the power has failed. She was going to visit her husband who is on life support, which has now but out.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did Timmy pass his chemistry exam? Because he studied.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the cop say to the black man being arrested? His Miranda rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats the difference between Obama and Romney answer: one would have been a good president instead of a communist

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

thumb_up thumb_down +14

You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's the difference between a duck? A toothbrush, because a car only has four doors!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two hippies walk into a bar. They are both asked to leave because they are in violation of the 'no shoes, no service' policy.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you change you dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue a pyschorapist just ate me refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Dont follow this link.......http://www.google.com/imghp?hl=en&q=blue+waffle&tab=wi

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the black jewish homosexual say to the conquistador? Nothing as they were both from entirely different time periods.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops