What's black and white and red all over? Obama covered in red paint.

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Why was the jew so happy? He won the lottery which at the time was 3.40 dollars

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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A man walks into a bar. Now he needs stitches on his forehead because he was walking pretty fast

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

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Roses are red violets are blue I have herpees.

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Why did peter shake the baby? To kill it and rape its dead corpse

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You say: Why did the chicken cross the road? Response: Why? (or some other answer to a different joke) You say: To get to your house! Knock, knock. Response: Who's there? You say: The CHICKEN!!!!

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What is orange and sticky? A blue ice cream with no skeletal structure Hang on, Ice Creams don't talk and the ice cream wasn't even yellow!

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What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Why are fire trucks red Well fire trucks have 4 wheels, and they have 8 people in them, 4+8, is 12, there are 12 inches in a foot, a foot is a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a ruler, Queen Elizabeth was a boat, boats sail the seven seas, fish are in the seven seas, fish have fins, the Finns defeated the Russians, Russians are red, And that is why fire trucks are red.

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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Jovan

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

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What did the black man say to the Hispanic? Lovely weather we're having.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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