Q: Why are black people afraid of Chainsaws? A: Because it could kill them as it could any other individual.

I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

How does Cee Lo Green order extra ketchup? Can I have some more ketchup, please?

Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

Poems are great but sometimes they don't make refridgerater

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

,try this on a girl, say "can I pop your cherry.........soda bottle cap off your cherry soda bottle?"

A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

Why was the man hit by the car? Hellen Keller was driving.

YOU

Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What did the Asian say to the Mexican working at the friutstand? Hi, I'm Asian!

My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...