What did one penguin say to the other? Flippty-flop-dop-boop-de-bop. Jazzhands.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

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wHY DIDN'T THE HORSE FINISH COLLEGE? HIS GRANT RAN OUT AN HE COULDN'T GET ANOTHER STUDENT LOAN.

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

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What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

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Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

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why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

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What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him

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whats disappointing and not funny? this joke. ouch.

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Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops