why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

roses are black violets are grey... im color blind sorry

whats 2+2? math.

:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

What did the apple say to the banana. Nothing fruits cant talk.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

so... how about that airplane food

Gay's

Why are pigs smelly ? Because a cucumber can't walk.

Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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