Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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Your momma so stupid, she dropped out of school at a young age of 12.

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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Your momma's so fat that she can't pass through some turnstiles and needs go through some other way with people staring and feel sad about it.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The chicken saw greater opportunities to find food on the other side

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a man walks into a bar he has a drinking problem and we are all consered

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Q: What is the scariest thing ever? A: Child Birth.

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virginity but he got it back

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why'd my house get destroyed I was afraid the tornado that hit mass was going to destroy it so I blew it up

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a white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy all jump off a building. they all immediately die on impact, later on the news white guy jumps off building.

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why did winnie the pooh have his head in the toilet,? it was clogged.

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

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wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

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How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

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what smells like diarrhea and looks like diarrhea? diarrhea stupid

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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How do you stop a bus? throw a boy with an ice cream cone infront of the bus. but...come to think of it, that may not work. he might drop the ice cream on top of it >:l

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops