A Russian who dosen't like vodka

ur mamas so ugly cause when she looked up at the sky it started to rain

A doctor walks into a bar, he stumbles backwards as he is taking his coat off, and the barman chuckles.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf.

If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

wael.. nuff said

whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

How are a pizza and a jew similar? They both are people aside from the pizza.

can you touch your toes? no

if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

"Why isn't Bud capable of reading?" Bud is a stone "Why can't Peter drive?" Peter is a woman

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

A black man walks into KFC. the whole room..THE GAME.

Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

wanna here a joke? you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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