Knock, knock. Who's there? Me, your friend George! You don't remember me! Oh. Sorry. I'm kidding. I'm a robber.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

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What's worse then your pets death? I don't know I asked you.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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That is a bad anti-joke down there | V

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Women's Professional _________

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A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they choose to. this is a free country, where people are free to travel as they please, despite what their sexual orientation may be. Jerk.

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Larchmont Park is the biggest shithole in the european union - Only the jippo part tho, lots of flies live in that part <3

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Two people are sitting on a 10th story window sill. They both fall off and die.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

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i like how everyone hates a german version of an antijoke but no one has aknowleged the english one

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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An atheist dies and so will we all, eventually.

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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Knock knock Come in

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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