Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

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How do you make people run? When someone is behind you, hold the door open and wait.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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A drunkard stumbles into the bar. Now he's got thousand's of dollars in medical bills.

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A mexican and a black person are in the back of a car. Whos driving? A bus driver.

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cot Death.

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What do a snake and a bird have in common... They both fly, except the snake

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

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How do you fit 10 dead babies in a bowl? A blender How do you get them out? Chips

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Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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Rebecca Black starts to sing a song, and when breaking out into her annoying chorus, we realize that it's not about the days of the week.

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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