Why couldn't Danny learn the alphabet? Because a man of forty was staring at him in a very peculiar way and Danny found it very difficult to concentrate.

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why did the deer jump, because there was something in it's way

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What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

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What's black and really really smelly? Martin Luther King Jr.'s grave.

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Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

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If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

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why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

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what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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gabbi nunez ;)

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so a man walks into a bar *pint of bud there please

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Why do jews have big noses? Because the air is free!

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

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Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it isn't red.

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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Why did the downy jump off a cliff? I told him to.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty four year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

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Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops