One dark, stormy night, there was a man, limping slowly down the road. He looked across the road and noticed a little girl on a park bench. He carefully moved around behind , creeped up, and slowly tapped her on the shoulder. I tap 2 tap 3 tap The little girl slowly turned her head, and as she did, the man uttered 3 sentences.... "Would you mind helping me get back to my apartment, my hand was cut off in the war, while I was serving my country, which is why I have a hook as opposed to a hand. I was heading back to my apartment to greet my wife and 2 little children, since I just got back from a long day's work at the soup kitchen, helping those in need, and I sprained my ankle. By the way, my name I John Thompson."

Abbie shaved her arse today....then it smiled at me

This is not a joke

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him, "Would you like a drink?". The horse cannot understand english and is confused by its surroundings. The horse gallops out of the bar knocking over a few stools

One guy asks another guy, "Why did the sleeping man get sucked into the sinkhole?" The other guy replies, "I don't know, I heard about that a few months ago, it seems highly improbable statistically. "

Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

How do black men eat chicken? Chicken goes in bone come out.

I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

Why did Mufasa miss his doctor's appointment? Because he was trampled to death by wildebeest

what do u call something black and hanging from a tree.............................. a black guy

7+5=12

Why is jordan goldstein a fag cause he doesnt like my videos

Whats the same about Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler They are both comedians

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

What happens when you hit a black guy with your car? He is seriously injured.

Why are black people good at basketball? Because they train hard and practice daily.

what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

HOLY SHIT!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? For fitness! ...yeah... nobody laughed when Jonah Hill said it either... awkward

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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