One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to use a female name.

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If a tree falls in a forest and only one women is there to hear it, does i make a sound? Trick question: there's no forests in kitchens.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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knock knock whose there banana banana who well, since a banana is a fruit and not human, it does not have parents and thus no last name was given to it.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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You know what is totally sick? A person with stage II cancer.

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Did you hear about the deaf kid? He didn't.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he was to busy watching porn. And then was hit by a truck.

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What's the difference between 9/11 and Jenga? Jenga games regularly don't kill around 3000 people.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he had poor coordination.

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A man walks into a bar

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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Whats worse than getting an eye gouged out? Getting both eyes gouged out?

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what do u call a fat guy in a pool u

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

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roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops