Yo mama so fat, she should see a doctor to discuss healthier lifestyles.

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You're flying above the Kansas Ocean, you lose your brakes and have to paddle all the way to shore. How many dogs can you fit on a carousel? Blue, because Ice Cream is cold.

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I want to make a lamp shade out of your skin, because you light up my life.

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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roses are red violets are blue you little stupid a*s b**ch i aint f***ing with you

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

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What do you call a black woman that flys a plane? - a pilot...

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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how do u talk to a person you like go up and talk to them

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

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hashtags suck balls

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

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What's a fat chinaman? A guy who somehow got obese on rice. HOW DOES THAT HAPPEN?!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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What do you call a Simon with no arms and legs? Simon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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