Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Whats worse than Coke A: Diet Coke

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

knock knock whos there johovas witness O-0

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did little Sally drop her ice cream? She got ran over by the school bus

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -20

New groundbreaking research has just revealed today that a complex sentence can be used to manipulate the human mind, so in this sentence somewhere is a psychological amemphism that subconsciously hypnotises the mind into doing something within the next five seconds, and if you read this sentence over and over again, you might just spot it!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did david give back? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Hey i heard You were a wierd kid ooooooooooalskdfjaslkdfj

thumb_up thumb_down -20

2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

thumb_up thumb_down -20

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the blond have a broken nose? because she was brutaly beaten by five rapists when she refused to have sex with them.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What is worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? F*cking midgets

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops