How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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Bariande: I have a belly button Kraken: haha who doesnt? MissAwkward: i dont Barinade: neither do i. haha this happened on tiny chat.

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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Teacher: "Kenny, what is the biggest mammal on land?" Kenny: "A stranded whale."

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eden stop

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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What's big and green and would probably kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

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What do you call a black person who has fallen? an ambulance

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

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What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the poll booth to vote on a law restricting the questioning of chickens destination and furthermore to let chickens cross with out ridicule.

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A man walked into his house He saw his wife having an affair with his teenage Gardner

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? I throw a refrigerator at him.

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When did Osama Bin Laden die? Nobody gives a @!?$

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What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What did Santa say to the prostitute? "Merry Christmas!"

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Whats the difference between a car and a baby? I would have a hard time throwing a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops