Feminism.

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Suppose an American, an Indian, a dinosaur, and a leprechaun are on a plane together. Which one would be the first to chug a 7 pound bottle of coke? The situation is too unlikely, with the odds of it occurring being less than 1%, therefore the question cannot be answered accurately.

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s

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

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Where do you study to get a good education? A library, at home, or at another quiet location where it is easy to concentrate.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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Yo mama is so fat she died

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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Q: What do you call a guy that is smart? A: A SMART Guy.

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An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

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what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

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How do you get a child off a swing? Throw a fridge at him

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What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

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How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

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Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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Hey, have you heard the one about the elf and the watermelon? Neither have I.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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Whats worse biting into an apple and finding a worm? -bidoof

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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guess what What? Apsolutly nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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