A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

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Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

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What did one say to the other woman? I have a penis

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Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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Why did the man cross the road? To get to the homeless shelter.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Knock knock, Whos there? Your adopted.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? T get to the other side of the road

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This is a haiku I said this is a haiku You read a haiku

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Where's Waldo? In rehab. Waldo is in rehab.

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What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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