What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to give him a bad reputation, but not enough to kill him

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2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

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So a woman walks into a store... There's a lamp selling for $5.99. She buys it because she thinks that's a pretty good deal.

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A dying man walked into a shop and started to look at the clothing on display. Then he died.

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What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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What happens when two black people go into a store with masks on? They buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

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Waffles ate my grandma

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

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Why does beyonce sing "to the left to the left?" cause women have no rights

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What starts with "R" and ends in "JUR"? RJUR.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding two worms. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Dying from cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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