my uncle used to tickle me.. he's in prison for child abuse

what do you call a man with no arms or legs jetskiiing? I don't know but it seems a highly improbably situation.

Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

Yo mama's so gay, she's a guy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

Chuck Norris is so strong that he could bench almost 250 pounds in his heyday.

how do you punish helen keller? leave the plunger in the toilet.

What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

Chuck Norris is dead......

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

what is big, black, and has hair on it. a big black guy with hair.

Miškinis gerai prikolina.

Why are black people good at basketball? While there are many preternaturally gifted black men and women in professional basketball, the notion that one race holds sway over the others in terms of sheer skill and talent is a ridiculous stereotype; propagated, no doubt, by both ignorant and jealous persons of other colors.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

What's Big and Round? My Testicular Cancer

Philosoraptor, turds IM A SPAMBOTz B=Not really, just blind.

Q: What did Albert Einstein say to Adolf Hitler? A: They never talked. And if Albert Einstein did say something to Adolf Hitler, he would have died first.

I had a lemon. hi.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None,it eats plants.

Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why is wood brown Because wood is brown

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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