Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

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A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

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Why did the man get ran over by th STREET? Because he crossed the TURTLE!

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What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

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Teacher- And that is why the Pythagorean theorem only works for RIGHT triangles. Any questions? Student- I like grapes.

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Like a bit of a cozy fight or something.

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

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Q: Ask me if I read the terms of use before I submitted this joke. A: I didnt

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What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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Hey, wanna hear a penis joke? Nevermind, it's too long.

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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How can you tell when a African man is lying? Like any other person you would use a lie detector.

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A woman crashes her car into a pole Thier family is suing for a hit and run

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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What happened when the Mexican put the Popsicles in the fridge? They melted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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