What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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why did arno fly away? he was a bird

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What did the policeman say to the black thief? You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do may be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to consult an attorney before speaking to the police and to have an attorney present during questioning now or in the future. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you before any questioning, if you wish. If you decide to answer any questions now, without an attorney present, you will still have the right to stop answering at any time until you talk to an attorney. Knowing and understanding your rights as I have explained them to you, are you willing to answer my questions without an attorney present.

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Q: What happened when Paul couldn't decide on Pornhub or Redtube. A: nothing since he doesn't have a d***

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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i fell like im going to reverse john becase i ate a bikle penis jackson

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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What are the two sexiest farm animals? Consider that we are humans we shouldn't find any sex appeal in animals but if i had to guess I would say Brown Chicka Brown Cow

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

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why are little kids like tree's? ... they both fall down when you hit them with an axe.

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I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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A: Is this the Krusty Krab? B: No, this is Pizza Hut. Please stop prank calling us.

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"I had angry birds before it was cool." -Alfred Hitchcock

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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