Three men are all in a car park and they all want the same parking spot. As it turns out, it was a trolley bay

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What did the boy call the man that kicked the cat? "Sad twat"

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game.

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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A guy walks into a bra. The woman screams and calls 991.

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A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

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Why did Bob stop at the light? Because it was red and not doing so would be illegal.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

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What did the Irish nun say on her deathbed? "I now realize that smoking was an unhealthy habit and I regret that I made the choice to do so." Then she died

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What is worse than failing a class? Dress up for grown-ups.

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What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

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What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Not having an apple, reguardless of its inhabitants.

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why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops