the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

Stranger at door: *Knock knock* Oliver Twist: Who's there? Stranger at door: Not your parents.

What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

What sinks quickly to the bottom of a river? Your dead parents.

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

Why did Kelly lose all interest in men? An aneurysm in her brain popped

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

Why is six afraid of seven? Seven is a rapist.

A girl asked for lip balm. She put some on and her lips exploded.

Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Your mom is so fat, she is having angioplasty. She might need a ride a home.

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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