How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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Many people of many races do many things every day.

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a ab

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

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Why did the two blondes decide to ride in one car? Because it's more environmentally friendly than taking two cars.

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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darude- sandstorm

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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What's long, hard, and full of seamen? An ejaculating penis.

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A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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You wanna see something really scary?

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OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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