Why was the little boy cold? Cause he was traped In a fridge

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What happened to the boy who survived a tragic car accident?? He stepped out of the car and got hit by a semi.

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SCENE: A prirate walks into a bar with the wheel of the ship attached to his pants. BARTENDER: Doesn't that hurt? PIRATE: Aye! It drives me nuts.

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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Roses are green,violets are blue,i'm high as ****,is that perfume or glue?

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What's worse than being shot? Being shot twice.

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What happens when you throw a midget off of a tall building? It dies and the people below get midget on them

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Well You're Full Of It . -Full Of What ? Well , Probably Blood And Other Organs You Can't Live Without . .

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What do you call a clock that neither ticks nor tocks? A broken clock

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Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

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A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

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Whats the difference between a bong and a nigger? My bong works

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A: Knock Knock B: Whos there A: Orange B: Orange who A: Arent you glad i didnt say chair

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

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whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

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What is a pirate's favorite movie? A pirated movie.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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