What did the mom say to her clinically depressed son? You're dad died

If Jonny has 300 pies and eats 299 pies what is left for Jonny? DIABETES

A police officer walks into a doughnut shop. He approaches the cashier and hands him 20$. He says "Here, I saw you drop this on your way in" he promptly leaves the store.

Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

When a Jew with a boner walks into a wall what hits first? It really depends weather his arm or leg is sticking out when he hits the wall. When studying trejectory sciences, you will find out that it will be nearly a 95% chance that his foot will in fact hit the wall first.

Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

why did the mexican choose to work as a landscaper instead of at taco bell? landscaping pays much better and was a more practical decision in this economy to support his family of 13.

Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

i just pooped that is all!

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

What would EARTH without ART be? EARTH, you dummy.

What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

orange -banana and lemon say....... i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i want to eat u (RANDOMZZZZZ)

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

What's the difference between a banana and a monkey? They're both yellow, except the monkey

Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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