What's the difference between a Jew and a cucumber? You can't gas a cucumber.

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

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Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive a train? Because she was blind, deaf, and most likely uneducated in the field of train conduction.

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A man had sex with his secretary. She was his wife.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the little midget is coming for you. If you don't run and if you don't hide, you will probably be stepped on because of my incredible big size.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

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Knock Knock Whose there? Me! Hi

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what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: He has a debilitating disease, it's called ALS.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Poop!!

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Your mother's breath smells so bad that it just doesn't smell very good at all.

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Roses are red..... violets are blue...... I have a gun get in the van

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dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

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How many black guys can fit in a minivan? Eight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops