How do you get your girlfriend's yapping Chihuahua to be quiet? Throw it through a window.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she had leprosy and had to have her legs and arms amputated

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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http://i.imgur.com/BJsbT.jpg

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Whats the worst thing about walking through a meadow of dead babies My boner

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why did the fish get flushed down the drain? because it was dead

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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In this case, its black operations, but simply in the term that its a well secret something, its not a lets say, organization that breaks the law, kidnaps listens to phones uses wires, which the FBI does. And when I mean I am a employee, I might have spoken a bit over my head here (sorry, lightheaded), you could well, simply put, I am something between a delivery boy and a mercenary, not the kind that shoots and kills (my shape sucks anyways), but rather the kind that "facilitates" communications between organizations... Thats all I can say without breaking laws that technically do not exist.

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A man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to get severe concussion, goes to hospital and dies three days later after suffering multiple brain haemorrhages.

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Q: Why was the prostitute's mouth sore? A: She had multiple cavities due to poor dental hygiene.

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What do owls and cars have in common? Nothing.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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White boy in jail. "That ish crazy!!"

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Knock Knock. Who`s there? The police, your family were killed in a bakery A German bakery.

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A man became infected with Staphylococcal Food Poisoning. The doctor said, "You only have 24 hours to live." He died 24 hours later.

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What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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what goes in hard, comes out soft, and you blow on it? bubble gum!

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How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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