A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

What do you call a blue bucket? A blue bucket. What do you call a red bucket? A blue bucket in disguise.

What dies but was never living? The hopes and dreams of small children.

Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

Yo mamas so stupid that she has a condition called autism

why did the girl say what's up. she wanted to know what they were doing

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

If you like piña coladas! You might be an alcoholic

If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

Whats bloody and is dead. My son.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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